Posts Tagged ‘marriage’

Well this happened rather quickly…

Sunday, February 7th, 2010
  
Currently Reading: Harry Potter and the Socrcer's Stone - J.K. Rowling
Currently Listening: This American Life Podcast

…more books to talk about!  To be fair, half of the books were complete page-turners, and the other half were really super short.  As I’m now taking a reading break and just re-reading Harry Potter (and I know I don’t have to tell you how I feel about those books) I might as well go ahead and fill you in on what I just finished reading…

1.  Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage – Elizabeth Gilbert.  This is Liz Gilbert’s second book, her first being eat pray love, one of my all-time favorites.  This book was by no means a disappointment.  I had a really difficult time putting it down, actually.  While still a memoir, this book is slightly more philosophical and sociological than her previous best-seller.  Having both been through terrible divorces, Liz & her lover (met at the end of epl) decide they will never remarry. 

Unfortunately, when the Dept. of Homeland Security blocks Felipe from ever entering the United States again (where Liz’s home and his business are) the only option they really have is…marriage.  So, Liz Gilbert writes this book in a cathartic manner, and we see her attempts to understand marriage – both sociologically and personally.  It is excellently written and I pretty much adore her, so I love absolutely everything she says.  Frighteningly, some of her concerns with marriage are things I have thought myself – and things I know my friends have thought.  So in that sense, it provides interesting social commentary as well.  Oh, also, I want to be Elizabeth’s Gilbert’s best friend.  Thanks.

2. Angela’s Ashes - Frank McCourt.  So, sometime when I was in middle school, my sister or mother or someone read this book…and all I know is ever since then, I have been told that I *have* to read this book.  It took me literally almost 10 years, but I finally got around to it.  And it was worth the wait.  While an incredibly sorrowful tale, McCourt’s writing is just…phenomenal.  You can really hear each person in his life talking to him.

Additionally, I love how he manages to write from the perspective of the age he’s speaking from.  When he’s six years old in the story, the thought process represented is really that of a six year old.  It doesn’t feel so much like looking back as experiencing.  And obviously, the personal triumph he makes over his life’s circumstances is impressive on a number of levels.  Also, I obviously adore any man who as a child fell in love with the words of Shakespeare…it’s kinda my thing.

To briefly summarize, Frank McCourt was born in NYC, America, at the beginning of the Great Depression.  His parents were both Irish immigrants who had a one-night stand of sorts…and since they were Irish Catholic, had to marry.  From there his parents had 4 additional children Stateside.  After the youngest dies, the family is forced to return to Ireland due to financial constraints.  Unfortunately, while McCourt’s father is an excellent dad relationally, he is a raging alcoholic and does not provide for his family; he drinks while the children starve.  Things do not improve much in Ireland in the wake of the Irish famine…and from there the story continues.

3.  Man’s Search for Meaning – Victor E. Frankl.  To continue my vein of somewhat-depressing-but-truly-inspiring-stories-of-personal-growth-and-triumph-in-extreme-adversity, I read this book, recommended to me by Lovell.  Frankl’s psychological memoir of living through the concentration camps in the Holocaust is incredible.  His worldview is truly profound, and his analysis is articulate and thorough.  There are so many just plain and simple good rules for living in this book…it’s all about how when everything is stripped away from us, literally everything, we still have the freedom to choose how we respond.  Ironically, this is a lot of what work is about for me.  It was kinda scary to be mentally comparing concentration camps to my program…whether from the perspective of the clients or the staff.  But in actuality, I guess it is a lesson that spans across a variety of crises: we can only control our own reactions.  We have no control over other people or circumstance.  The main premise of the book is that man can find meaning in life through either achievements, relationships, or suffering.  The paradoxical comfort in this is that even if no other way is open, there is always at least suffering.  And suffering can always at least bring meaning and personal growth.  Truly amazing perspective.

4.  Identity – Milan Kundera.  So uh apparently I was rereading this book.  It was a strange experience tho to keep thinking “Did I finish this book before?” but I couldn’t remember how it ended.  But once I finished it I was like “Oh yeah.  I did read this book already.”  I had just kind of forgotten.  This is not a criticism of the book – I was in a strange place when I read it the first time, and it’s a strange book, and is even intended to read somewhat like a disjointed dream sequence.  But anyway.  This was heavy on the existentialism.  After the emotional drain from the previous two books, it was kind of depressing to read about the uncertainty and meaninglessness in human relationships.  It’s an interesting little story tho, and I do adore Kundera’s writing.  His ability to portray human relationships and dialogue is seemingly effortless.  He really captures the tension in romantic relationships well, especially in terms of the boundaries between independence and love.  Specifically in this novel, he’s dealing with the question of whether or not we ever really know the person we are in relationship with…and how relationships can change our perspectives of our own identities.  How do we maintain our individual identities in the face of the blending found in relationships and the changes that relationships create in our lives?  Heavy shit.  And ironically, it ties back to Elizabeth Gilbert’s book concerning marriage…hm.

So, there you have it.  Lots of provocative thoughts and ideas from these books, but I do need a bit of a break.  So it’s time for some pure, quality entertainment.  However, if you are wanting to ponder some deep-seated questions about people and relationships, I definitely recommend any of these books.  All are quick reads (even the longer ones, just because they’re so good) and all are guaranteed to make you think.

Hey, do you wanna get married?

Thursday, August 2nd, 2007
  

So, I’ve been putting off updating for awhile, and not for any reason in particular.  I guess I finally just got settled into the routine of summer and didn’t have that much to say about it.  Things continue to go well, altho they have certainly been busy in the typical way life is.  Last night we had some visitors, Sarah & Johnny, and their 3 kids (Sarah is Rosie’s best friend from…forever).  There oldest is a girl named Grace, and then they have John (who is Joe’s age) and Luke (who is Jack’s age).  Jack, however, seemed kind of in love with Grace.  It was adorable/hilarious.  Grace & her dad were watching fireflies out the window last night, and Jack comes up and starts rubbing her back and talking to her, then starts rubbing her butt a little bit.  Then he’s like “Hey, you can see them better from the playroom, come on downstairs”.  It’s hilarious!  Grace is, btw, 7, and Jack is 4.  Then today at lunch, all the kids are talking and Jack says out of nowhere “Hey Grace, do you wanna get married?” Grace:  “Um not yet.” John: “Yeah, we’re too young, we’re not allowed to get married.  We are allowed to have girlfriends though.” Jack:  “Oh.  Well I have a girlfriend already.”  All the other kids *laugh* “Who?”  Jack: ” Her name is um…um…her name is…Luke’s sister”.  A-freakin-dorable.

So otherwise, outside of Munchkin-land, I’m just trying to get ready mentally and organizationally for this upcoming school year.  Planning Parables stuff, studying (for me, like crazy) for the GRE, researching grad schools, writing out goals, sending fundraising letters, downloading applications for various things, etc etc.  Not to mention obsessively reviewing books on facebook (Rachel: I’m so glad you joined!!!!) .

Tomorrow night we leave for the beach!  Bob and I are driving down with the two older boys (spending the night in Beckley), and then picking Rosie up from the Raleigh airport with Bennett on Saturday before driving the rest of the way down to Ocean Isle.  I’m pretty excited for this vacation, altho afterwards is when things get a little crazy in terms of where I’ll be when.  Trying to see people, perform for LP, and take the GRE…plus moving all my stuff around from its various sundry locations…ah well.

So overall, life is pretty good :)   I’ve also seen 3 new movies recently (well I’ve seen a TON this summer but nevermind that) : The Good Shepherd, The Departed, and Nanny McPhee. Departed was phenomenal and totally deserves its awards.  And um, hi, yeah I’ve always been in love with Leonardo, so I don’t even know what to call my level of infatuation at the moment.  Good Shepherd was alright, but I wasn’t that blown away.  The acting was good & everything, but I wasn’t really paying attention and that seemed rather critical…And as for McPhee…I freaking loved it!  I thought it was fabulous.  Then again, my feelings for Colin Firth are on par with those for DiCaprio.  (I do love that kid tho, the one from Love Actually).  The story was just awesome also, and the costume design was wonderful.  So, all in all, good movie watching.  Minus a few poor experiences like Catch and Release.  *Shudder*.